Spider

Last night I had a dream that my eyebrow was growing the same way as my hair does, curly and really bushy. My eyebrow was growing really thick. Part of it was growing out and over the middle and when I pushed this bit to the side, underneath I found the remains of a spider’s egg sac. It was covering most of my eyebrow and had left a brown, sticky residue. I was already in the bathroom and when I looked in the mirror, I noticed that the spider was still there. It was the size of a two dollar coin and was crawling across my face. I wasn’t scared by it and calmly swatted it off and started to wash the weird brown webbing off of my eyebrow. The dream was more than strange. I got the sticky stuff off and thought about maybe trimming my eyebrows.

Career

Six letters that are supposed to encompass the trajectory of your working life. Where do I even begin if I can’t focus on, can’t choose what path I’m going to take? Inundated with choices and options and maybes and ‘that sounds good’ but never being able to determine whether that or this will be satisfying. In a word, frustrating.

Career.

Who am I?

A list of things I like doing:

  • Writing
  • Singing
  • Talking to people and learning about their stories
  • Cooking
  • Listening to stories
  • Learning languages and hearing them
  • Learning about other countries
  • Thinking about travelling (I have yet to plan a trip)
  • Thinking about creating things (I fail in doing because a part of me is afraid. I am in the process of slowly taking down the wall of fear)

A list of things I care about:

  • Family
  • Friends
  • The environment
  • Finding balance in my life
  • Feeling one with nature
  • Living in an environmentally friendly way
  • Art and culture
  • People and connecting with them

A list of things that are important to me:

  • Family
  • Friendship
  • Living out my beliefs and values
  • Living a less materialistic lifestyle
  • My health
  • Being true to myself

Arbitrary days

Life is random. We try to make sense of it by believing we have a path that we can walk along.

We convince ourselves that the people we meet, the places we go to, the decisions we make occurred because there was reason in it. What if it’s not?

There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s OK. Life is a series of arbitrary events that make each individual’s story unique.

Our brains can’t fathom the idea that our memories are composed of chance encounters. So, we rearrange and manipulate our past until they form connections so that we can better understand our present and move towards the future. Doing that, life doesn’t seem so random.